The Funniest Thing I've Heard In A Long Time

06.29.05 (9:44 am)   [edit]
I was in a gas station last night, about to buy some godawful corn-syrup laden soft drink (even though I know better) and I'd been aware of the two women behind the counter as I walked in, not really paying attention as they were discussing something about celebrities.

Right as I walked to the counter, one of them (who sorta looked like Edie Falco in more bad eyeliner with an extra 40 pounds) said "Jessica Simpson can lick my hairy love-slit!"

Wow.

Let me repeat that.

She said, "Jessica Simpson can lick my hairy love-slit."

The other girl started laughing her balls off, which has to be hard to do when you're a girl. Me, I managed to pull my tongue back out from my throat, put the Pepsi on the counter, and, as I turned blue from asphyxiation, started clapping. Applauding this fine upstanding lady for her fine taste in...uh...whatever it was. Which made *her* laugh, so I felt like I'd done my part.

Jessica Simpson can lick my hairy love-slit. Damn, I wish I'd had a love-slit just long enough to think of that one first.

Still in awe 15 hours later,
Dougie

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