'Til I Reach My Highest Ground

'Til I Reach My Highest Ground

In fact, I actually was trying to do just that. Very cute girl. Medium build, brown hair, granny glasses. Not amazing, but very, very cute.

"I hope you don't mind me saying this, but you've gotta be the cutest thing I've seen all day."

A total fucking lie. I'd seen at least a dozen women at the gig who looked better. Jesus, Doug, you prick. But hey, I'm trying to get some pussy here.

"Wow. Thank you. I don't here that too often."

"Oh, I'd think you'd hear it seven or eight times a day." Now I'm REALLY laying on the horseshit...

Big smile. Damn, she's cute. I'd like to ruin her life. Come here baby, let Dougie give you half an inch of something that'll make you turn lesbo in five seconds. Yeah, baby. You know you want it.

I'm going to Hell.

So she comes back. And I'm about to push it farther, because it looks like I might have a shot at this girl. She asks me if I want more coffee (I did something TOTALLY against my moral code and got decaf, but I'd like to actually sleep tonight since I know I won't for a week) and gives me that cute smile. Like she's anticipating something.

"No thanks. And...uh...er..."

I totally choked. She let out the cutest laugh, like she thought *I* was cute for completely losing my shit and forgetting how to SPEAK.

For fuck's sake, asshole, you got this far. Close the goddamn deal.

Why am I such a fucking pussy?

I took the idiot way out and borrowed a pen from the guy up front. "You're a very lovely young lady, and I'd enjoy the opportunity to get to know you better." Left my name and phone number.

Fucking pussy.

Because I've had it on my mind, I sang Just Like A Woman tonight, then Lay Lady Lay, which I'd done with Dennis, but I hadn't sang it myself for an audience until tonight. I can do it better, but it was pretty good. I played OK, not brilliantly, but I'm getting my desire to explore back in full force, and I went for a lot of different licks tonight, trying to play shit I hadn't played before. I did pretty well. Pounded the groove on one of the newer things in our repetoire, Stevie Wonder's Higher Ground. What a killer tune that is.

If I had the kind of balls talking to women that I do playing bass, I'd be getting blown six times a day. Goddamn it I'm such a fucking pussy.

Oh well. We'll see what happens tomorrow. I'm at my parents' now, I'll be staying here in Marion all day tomorrow, do some genealogy stuff, go to the next gig tomorrow around 6:00 to set up.

And Sunday I'll see Katie. One year to the day after I left. I still remember that day very clearly. I'm glad I've managed to make up for some of what I did to her in running across the country like that.

Now if I can just keep her from being a total fucking coward like her daddy is, maybe she'll grow up right. Shit, she's already smarter than I am.

Fucking pussy,
Dougie