Shoot Is Shit With Two O's

Shoot Is Shit With Two O's

"Have a good one, D!"

"See you next week!"

Hmmm. MAYBE it was a 24-hour laundry service. I'm thinking somebody got his knob shined. Either that or she got her stash for the week. I talked to her for a couple minutes this morning (standard neighborly bullshit) and she seemed quite WIRED FOR ACTION. Cute little whore, but she scares me.

Saw H yesterday and this morning. I had to buy a new mop this morning since the old one was...uh...I think you could cure cancer with the shit on the end of it.

She's expecting in August. She looks AMAZING. And practically about to fall out of her top were....oh my fuckin' gawd...look at those tits...

"Didn't get a call from you."

She looked away. "I know. I'm sorry. I really just can't call you."

"Of course you can't. It was insane of me to suggest such a thing."

"No, it's OK. It was really tempting." she looked up briefly with a funny smile.

Dick, meet zipper.

"Really?" I gave her my best smile. And probably sounded as out-of-breath as I suddenly felt.

"Yeah. You're very nice to me. Thank you. But I can't, you know."

"I know. And you're very nice yourself. Not to mention amazingly beautiful."

She turned about sixteen shades of red. Man, this is cool...

"I wish my husband would say that to me more often."

Now what do I say to THAT? "I'm sorry to hear that."

"He barely wants to touch me anymore." She looked...what was that? Definitely unhappy.

Now me, *I* want to touch her. Oh fuck I sure do.

"I'm sorry. I hope things change for you after the baby."

"They better." Wow. THAT was an evil little grin.

Somebody got in line behind me. Fuck.

"Have a good one. I don't know when I'll be back by, but good luck with everything."

"Thank you. You too. I hope your move goes OK."

"H? Don't forget - I think you're fantastic."

"You are too. Thank you."

I walked out about ready to collapse. My back was hurting, my head was spinning a bazillion fucking miles an hour.

Damn. If only...

Bad craziness, Dougie. Bad fuckin' craziness. Time to get the fuck on the road away from here.

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I've said it enough times already. But damn, I'm gonna miss Indy. It's hard to be in that apartment now. Most of my stuff is out now. But I laid there this morning for half an hour just wanting to milk those moments for all they were worth. I love that place. I wish I could take it with me. But I can't. And there's one very good reason why not.

I saw Katie's rehearsal for her dance recital Thursday night. The recital itself is about to start as I type this. Between moving and the gig tonight, I couldn't go. Damn. But the rehearsal was great, and she looked WONDERFUL in her little dress. It was great to see how she reacts to being onstage. She loves it up there. She looks so confident, and she knew what she was doing. I was so proud of my girl.

It's good to see her more now. I'll spend part of tomorrow with her, not as much as I'd like since I have to come back to Indy one more time before handing my keys in Monday, but I can't wait to see her. I've got the best kid on the planet.

Gig with the "sub" drummer tonight. Haven't seen him in a month. I'm thinking ahead to what I want to do band-wise down in Cincy, still formulating ideas. Bill and I had a talk the other night about how much we both need to find ways of marketing what we're best at. We're both tired of this fucking grind that leads nowhere. The American dream of working hard until you have more? It's BULLSHIT. Especially today when we're owned and operated by corporations that are increasingly driving most Americans down further and further, with a government hell-bent on making us blame everyone but THEM AND THEIR CORPORATE MASTERS. We aren't entering an age of corporate feudalism because of immigrants or terrorists or liberals, we're here because of the SWINE who have come to own us and our futures.

FUCK them in their rancid assholes. I finally feel the strength to break free of that cycle. It will take time. It won't happen overnight. But it will happen. I'll find the way of marketing myself without compromising my soul. Goddamn it, I HAVE to.

Love,
Dougie

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