The Bare Bones Of My Eventual Stand-Up Career
01.24.07 (12:29 am) [edit]I was fucking about on my hard drive looking through old writing when I found something I wrote about a year ago. It made me laugh my balls off.
I seem to be meeting a lot of lesbians these days. Several this year. And that's great. I'm fine with that. I'm all for lesbians. I'm saving up money for a camcorder. Lesbians are our FRIENDS, guys. That's all they are, but hey. You've gotta have a woman around who can tell you when you're being an asshole who you KNOW you'll never have sex with. It's a good thing.
But dammit, where is the woman who is addicted to blowjobs? Come on. There's gotta be one out there somewhere. The girl who LIVES just to suck the tiny cock of a fat hairy bass player. She has her magnifying glass and a bottle of Jack for afterwards to wash away the foul taste and the stain from her soul, and she's ready for my lovin'. There's at least ONE out there, I'm sure. She works in a circus and has no friends, but she's out there SOMEWHERE, right? RIGHT???